Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
