When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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