Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Randomize