I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
