You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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