PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
