you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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