Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
