Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
