Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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