No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
