hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
