What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
