are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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