if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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