the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
