I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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