the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
