i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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