Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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