GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
