Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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