mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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