When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
