why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
