i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Randomize
