he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Randomize