In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
