I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
