I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
