Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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