pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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