I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just pee around me
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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