Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
