then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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