Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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