nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
True strength comes from lack of pants
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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