sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
