Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
