Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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