It's Friday. Sex?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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