How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
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