She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
