I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
birth control should be required to get into college
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
