a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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