On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Randomize
