I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
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