If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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