So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
