just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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