You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
