Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
he fucked my hip out of place.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
